I believe that 30% of what makes a good blowjob is correct kneeling technique. Seriously. Check out these blowjob pics for example and watch how I get into the proper position before I start sucking. There’s no squatting unless you’re wearing extremely high-heeled plateau shoes. Your knees must be on the ground (I know very well from experience that it can get painful after a while but I think it’s necessary and the right thing to do). The feet should be flat on the floor, toes pointing away from your ass. This is the only position that gives the guy a chance to keep eye contact while at the same time being able to check out your feet or high heels as well as your ass and boobs. I’m very submissive so I always try to obey these simple rules in order to look as best as I can while giving head. I even scraped my knees bloody once on a concrete floor while sucking off a guy in a basement. He didn’t notice and I sure as hell didn’t complain. Usually someone offers me a pillow or blanket to kneel on but I try to make do with the situation at hand even if it’s uncomfortable. I should really add a couple of other “etiquette” info articles on topics such as blowjob eye-contact (also illustrated on these pics) and swallowing technique. I see a lot of cum shot and blowjob porn in my line of work and I come across sloppy technique pretty much on a daily basis. I can only imagine the horrors in marital bedrooms. *lol* If you have a girl or wife that is in need of some serious porn training, check out my videos and articles on Cumtrainer.

According to the Re/Search Guide to Bodily Fluids (Paul Spinard, 1994), the average man produces about 3.5 mL of semen per ejaculation whose nutritional value is less than

1 calorie
150 mg. protein
11 mg. carbohydrates
6 mg. fat
3 mg. cholesterol
7% US RDA potassium
3% US RDA copper
3% US RDA zinc
300 million spermatoza

(Someday men will have to have all this tattooed to the side of their hip, like a can of Coke or a box of Wheaties.) It looks healthy enough per serving size, but when compared to breast milk (which has about 170 calories per cup), semen has about 40% more calories (about 230 calories per cup). High levels of fructose (fruit sugar) is normal in the semen and this sugar comes almost entirely from the seminal vesicles.

More Fun Sperm Facts
For the average man, the ejaculate contains over 80 million sperm.
Average volume of semen per ejaculation: 1-2 teaspoons
Average number of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime: 7,200
Average total amount of lifetime ejaculate: 18 quarts
Average speed of ejaculation: 28 miles per hour
Average duration of orgasm: 4 seconds

I’m not a photoshop guru by all means, but these instructions seem pretty simple and straightforward to me. Stumbled across this really fun tutorial about a year ago and kept it in case I’d find a good place to post it one day. And - lo and behold - now that I’ve got my own blog I can finally share it with a larger audience. Unfortunately I don’t know the original author’s name but let’s just say that we’re grateful for his vision and determination to go where no other geek has gone before. Gentlemen, fire up your image editors! I’ll be quoting from here on out, have fun

I tried to just draw the man milk at first but it didn’t produce realistic enough results. So why waste time trying to draw something when you can just superimpose the ejaculate and it comes out perfect with a little bit of tweaking. Here is how I did it.

STEP 1
Find a picture of a girl you want to “enhance”. Then find a picture of a girl who already got splattered. This is where Google images comes in.

STEP 2
Select a good chunk of man fluid to put on your new girl and drag it over. (click links for illustrations)

STEP 3
Desaturate it. Image -> Adjustments -> Desaturate

STEP 4
Image -> Adjustments -> Levels. Click on the black eyedropper on the bottom right. Its the eyedropper on the left. Adjust the levels until the cum is white and everything else is black.

STEP 5
Now the magic part, go to your blending modes and set it to Screen.

STEP 6
Almost done but it still needs some tweaking. We need to erase some of the semen so we make a layer mask, select a black big soft brush and start erasing the parts we don’t want. Then you can rotate it, scale it, or whatever you need to do. You may need to use the Liquify tool to bend it around curves. If that isn’t enough fluid for you just repeat the process and add more. Keep adding until you’re happy. Here’s the finished fake cum shot.

Of all sexual acts, anal sex is the most misunderstood. Despite the fact that one out of every four women has engaged in anal sex, the practice remains taboo. Many women are reluctant to experiment with anal sex because of the many myths and misconceptions that surround the practice. But once you learn the right techniques, it’s easy to see why anal sex can be so enjoyable. The anus contains a vast supply of nerves, and is one of our most sensitive erogenous zones. Stroking, massaging, and otherwise stimulating the anus can be intensely pleasurable. In fact, some women are able to orgasm from anal stimulation alone. Here you’ll find answers to the most common concerns about anal pleasures:

1. The anus is dirty.
Early in our childhood, we are taught that the anus is dirty and should not be touched. Thorough hand washing after accidentally touching this area is stressed. You may also have heard similar sentiments voiced about your vulva and vagina, but of course stimulation of these body parts can certainly provide a multitude of pleasurable sensations. With routine daily hygiene, the anus is as clean as other parts of your body. It does contain its own natural bacteria, though, and to avoid infections, you must never move anything from your anus to your vagina.

2. Anal sex is painful.
Anal sex should not be painful. If it hurts, you are doing something wrong. If you learn the proper techniques prior to experimenting, you may find it enjoyable. The keys to pleasurable anal sex are relaxation, lubrication and education. The anus is a tube that is one and a half inches long and surrounded by two rings of muscle. One ring, the external sphincter, is under your control. The other, the internal sphincter, will automatically tighten whenever something is pushed into your anus. Relaxing the external sphincter will make anal sex easier and more pleasurable. Your anus does not produce its own natural lubrication, so use lots of water-based lubricants to further increase your pleasure.

3. Anal sex is harmful and unhealthy.
Many women fear that anal sex will cause hemorrhoids, fissures or tears. Some even fear that they may become incontinent and spend the rest of their lives in adult diapers. Pleasurable anal sex does not cause harm to your anus or rectum. And as long as your partner does not have a sexually transmitted infection, neither semen nor sperm are harmful to your rectum. If you are not sure about the sexually transmitted disease status of your partner, use a lubricated latex or polyurethane condom during anal sex. Avoid condoms with spermicides as they may cause irritation of the sensitive anal and rectal tissues.

4. Anal sex is a perverted, unnatural act.
Anal sex has been an accepted sexual practice for centuries. In some cultures, women engage in anal sex with their male partners for sexual pleasure while protecting their virginity. You must decide for yourself what feels natural. If you are uncomfortable with any sexual act, don’t do it.

5. Anal sex is enjoyed only by homosexuals.
Long considered a purely homosexual act, anal sex is enjoyed by many heterosexual couples as well. Anal sex is simply another option for sexual gratification and is unrelated to your sexual identity.

This is the full FleshBot review: You may have already heard about the release of Heatseek, a new web browser designed specifically for the smuthound in you. We would be remiss, however, if we didn’t give this baby a test drive before sharing it with our readers. We’ve spent last 24 hours or so tinkering with this new porn-friendly toy and have a few thoughts about whether you should make a switch. Let’s go surfin’ now (everybody’s learnin’ how!) after the jump. For starters, Heatseek should probably be re-named Heatsneak, since its primary draw is the ability to keep your web habits hidden not only from the prying eyes of your boss, but anyone who uses your computer. During install, you can select dummy desktop icons and rename program folders to disguise its true nature. It has a password protect feature that must be used every time you start the program, and can be enabled even when minimizing and maximizing windows. There’s also a handy kill switch that shuts everything down with the push of a button.

Beyond privacy, Heatseek’s biggest and best feature is the ability to bring all the porn on your computer together in one easy interface. You can go from movies to pictures to the web and back simply by clicking tabs (no more separate windows for every file type) and organize slide shows and galleries with relative ease. While on the web, downloading is a snap, and we were impressed with how quickly you can grab an entire image gallery. Its coolest trick may be the ability to bookmark scenes in a video allowing you skip right to your favorite part.

Like any unstable friend, this browser does have issues. It’s PC only. It’s built on the IE engine, which is the bane of many developers. It doesn’t play Quicktime movies. It comes in free and pay versions, which means putting up with sales pitches for the upgrade and living without a few of the features. The website bookmarking leaves much to be desired, and all the favorites you so lovingly curated in Firefox won’t help you here.

However, Heatseek’s fatal flaw may be its all or nothing treatment of Javascript. It’s either on, which means popup and consoles galore, or you turn it completely off, which means even legitimate scripts will not work and many of your favorite sites may become unusable.

Heatseek is billed as a porn web browser, but its online features are actually its biggest weaknesses. If you’re looking for a quick and easy way to organize all you filthy files, or need a little extra protection from the family or coworkers, then you might consider giving it a whirl. Otherwise, you’re probably better off sticking with a more customizable browser like Firefox, and keep dancing with the one that brung ya.

(Via Fleshbot)

I’m sure you’re aware that there isn’t much “blowing” involved in a blowjob, but you may be unsure as to how much “sucking” is needed to suck someone off. Is there really suction involved, or is the pressure of lips and tongue enough to do the job? Suction is not “necessary”, but can be an enhancement if done right. If suction is used well, a larger surface area of the penis comes into contact with a larger surface area of the mouth, cheeks and tongue and with more pressure, which can be a good thing. If you can suck the cheeks in so far as to create a buffer to keep the teeth away from the penis, so much the better. It is hard to give a blowjob without your teeth coming in contact with his erection, but this is the ideal. A small amount of contact, incidental contact, is no foul, and no flag is thrown. Try different positions to find the one which allows you to take as much of the erection in your mouth as you can without it rubbing against your teeth.

It may take a few tries to find the position that’s best for you, but I bet he won’t complain about you experimenting down there. From my experience a position is best if it allows your tongue to rest against the underside of the penis, where the glans comes together into a cleft. This is probably the most sensitive part of the penis, and should be most thoroughly tongued during oral sex. While it is possible to give a prize-winning upside-down blowjob I believe that the inverted approach is more of an advanced technique. The majority of your blowjob should probably involve licking the head of the penis while it is in your mouth, and bobbing your mouth up and down on the upper couple of inches of the penis, but varying this with “deep-throating” the penis (I’ll be writing about that in-depth a little later on). And of course removing the penis from your mouth altogether in order to lick the head and shaft can be nice too.

Q: Hey Britney, I have a question that I thought would be perfect to ask you. Whenever my gf tries to swallow my load there’s always too much for her to handle. Shes always said shes never seen so much semen from one orgasm. Its like 4 or sometimes 5 table spoons. Is this normal? is there somethin wrong with me?

A: Well, statistically the avarage male ejaculates about a tablespoon full of semen. Seems like you might be genetically blessed in this regard. Shame your girlfriend doesn’t appreciate your above average sperm production. I wouldn’t worry about it too much though if you don’t experience any pain or discomfort (in that case I’d see a doctor just in case). But if you’re enjoying your orgasms and feel good about your massive ejaculations, well, then I can only congratulate you. I wish my bf could do that. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you, some people are just lucky to be equipped with great abs or a huge cock, others work out to no avail or buy penile enhancements because there’s just no way to change your genes (yet). Lucky you! Now all you gotta do is somehow sweet talk your girl into swallowing all that lovely semen. Sheesh, women can be so irrational…

Please rate Cumonbritney.com:

Q: How old were you the first time you had anal sex? And why do ass to mouth blowjobs turn you on?

A: I must have been “barely legal” when I tried it. It wasn’t my idea, but the guy I was going out with then was 15 years older than me and seemed to be very experienced sexually. As I soon found out, he wasn’t. I think we’d been together for a month or two and the anal experiment happened a couple of days before I finally decided that he was a jerk and broke up with him. Anyway, this is how it went: He asked me one night how often I’d had anal sex before. I told him that I was an anal virgin. So he frowns and tells me he’s “surprised” and wouldn’t have thought I was that “inexperienced”. And, he added, he’d show me if I wanted him to. I thought to myself, well, why not. I’d rather try it with someone who knows what he’s doing instead of some schoolboy who’d be even more embarrassed than me. Cut to the bedroom, a couple of hours later. He told me he had to be “really hard” for this to work and made me blow him. He always needed a long time to “get really hard” and this evening was no exception. After more than half an hour of sucking his dick he pulled me up from the bedroom floor where I was kneeling and flipped me onto my stomach. Then he pulled my ass up towards him. I was of course expecting him to fuck my pussy first, but he went straight for the back door.

I was starting to wonder about lubrication, since even a normal fuck is usually uncomfortable if there isn’t enough juice to ease penetration. Before I could finish that thought he literally became a serious pain in the butt. And I mean serious! I was biting the pillow and hoping this was just the penetration phase and things would improve. Of course they didn’t. Then the pain stopped and I realized he’d gone soft again. He was cursing quietly and told me it was my fault, because I was “pushing him out” all the time. He grabbed my head, spun me around and put his dick in my mouth. I was disgusted. Eeek, that thing just came out of my ASS! He pumped my head up and down and told me that he’d give me another chance - as soon as he was “really hard” again. Which - again - took a long time. I salivated like crazy during that second blowjob since I wasn’t going to swallow anything that had previously come out of my butt! This kinda made things easier when he spun me around once again. His cock was now dripping wet and he actually succeeded in pushing it into my asshole while I was chewing up the pillow. There was some lubrication now but it was far from ideal. One thing I was grateful for is that he had a small cock. Not tiny, but slightly below average size. So when he started slamming against my buttocks he couldn’t do any damage and the pain I experienced at first became endurable as I relaxed.

I reached a state where I became indifferent to what was going on and decided to wait it out. Fortunately he came after 10 minutes or so and squirted his load into my ass. I was relieved that I wouldn’t have to blow him again. Especially now that his cock had been so deep inside me. He collapsed on top of me and asked me if I’d enjoyed my “first time”, as he called it. I said, “no”. He rolled off of me and got up to get dressed. I vaguely remember him saying something brilliantly inventive like: “Hmf, well, I’d had better before. You need quite a lot of practice if you want my opinion”. Well, hmf, I didn’t care about his opinion and told him to leave. There is a lesson to be learned from this. First of all, anal sex is something you should try only with someone you really know and trust and who sincerely cares about you, especially if you’re a newbie. As paradoxically as this may sound, anal sex needs to be the most gentle form of intercourse - at least for newbies. If you don’t start out slowly and communicate a lot during penetration it’s simply not gonna work. If you have a ton of experience, you may be confident enough to try it on a one-night stand. But that’s a decision you have to make for yourself. The second thing that needs to be said is that you cannot over-lubricate! Lube up! Lube up! I can’t stress this enough. You wouldn’t believe how many couples fail and never try again because they thought a little spit or a tiny drop of lube would do the trick. It doesn’t. Lube up! Then enjoy. It’s a wonderful experience - as long as you don’t offer your asshole to some fucked up dickhead who hasn’t the slightest idea what he’s supposed to do, or not. So, why on earth, you wonder, do I enjoy ass to mouth blowjobs today?

To be honest - I don’t know. Maybe Freud has some answers. But I don’t consider my sexuality pathological and anal sex gives me a lot of pleasure these days. Quite possibly it’s the relationship I’m in now, which makes me feel cared for and respected. And since I’m a sucker for oral sex the combination of the two makes perfect sense, to me at least. I don’t particularly find delight in tasting myself, but the knowledge that I’m doing the really dirty stuff gives me that extra kick when I need it.